cat

Life....

1:57 PM

Hello my favorite strangers!
I haven't completely disappeared and I miss posting on my blog. I have had such amazing opportunities working with such GREAT companies, and I still hope I get to in the future.
So where have I been?
It has been exactly one year since my life has changed into something that hit me harder than any other tragic events in my life. This is more personal. More intense, and all up to me.
I have sacrificed a LOT and of course, it has been worth it to me. I have lost family relationships, friendships, missed out on a lot of job opportunities for my brand/personal growth. I will never give up and have been judged so harshly by people I love because of what this year has brought me. That breaks my heart even more than I ever thought possible.

When people go through the worst times of their lives, please don't forget to be their friend, you might not understand but that's okay, you don't have too. Be supportive. Help them, even just listening is one of the best things someone can do.

Life is good, bad, fun, sad, exciting, painful and intense.
Never judge,

My Kidney cat Chicken has been my child as I do not have any children, I chose to save his life and many do not understand that or even respect that. I have had an AMAZING vet who has thanked me for what I have done for Chicken and how well he is. You would NEVER know he was a kidney cat. He is my heart, and my family.

So with that little blurb, I hope I can get back into the swing of things, as this was a huge learning curve, and working two jobs had taken so much of my time I hope things only get better.....


Chicken is a healthy 15-year-old,19lbs Kidney cat!



<3

Has anyone reading this gone through this or is going through this? Sub Q fluids is the scariest thing I have ever done in my life, but I guess as they say since it is a daily thing now it becomes like brushing your teeth.....


Tay.

Delectable Coconut Hair & Body Mist

12:01 AM

DELICIOUS!

I smell this every time I see it and am money cautious aka cheap but HAD to purchase this!


I LOVE Delectable products especially their Coconut & Cream Triple Body Lotion.  It smells so damn good you question what it tastes like! Just kidding. For real though this is justs as nice!
The body mist is just as good, smells exactly like coconut, not overpowering and sadly since it is a body mist it certainly will not last all day.  This scent is "Heaven in a bottle!"
The bottle is a nice design and a good size for $10! So happy birthday to me LOL.
Give it a try next time you are in a store that carries Cake & Delectable products and let me know what you think!





Anxiety

5:18 PM


OVERWHELMING. SCARED. EXHAUSTED. SAD. HURT. EMBARASSED.  FEAR.  RUN. HELD BACK. NOT LIVING FULLY. UNHAPPY. WORRIED. NEVER ENDING THOUGHTS. SPIRALING. CRIPPLING. SUFFOCATING. TOO MUCH TALKING. TOO LITTLE TALKING. SICK TO MY STOMACH. SLEEPLESSNESS. 

All of those are just a slight blurb of what many people deal with DAILY. I have spoken of Anxiety before on my blog but never to the extent, I have the urge to now.

I am in a place in my life where I like to tell it how it is. The good, the bad and the anxiety. It is what it is. I know that is a sad way to word it. What I mean by "It is what it is" is that I have accepted this and now it is time to face it. When I can at least.

Most people go through life having normal anxiety, a healthy amount. The fight or flight amount. Others go through life with a crippling painful amount where someday's are difficult to even function at all. I have been living like this for years now......
I don't like it. I can't fix things I can only do my best day by day to survive.

I guess I am wanting to post this since I am not a big shot social media girl like many who have come out with their anxiety stories. I am just like you. They are just like us.  There are differences in all of us but we who have this are suffering and some don't have support.

As I write this, I question everything I type, the words, the way I am coming across, and I think, I cannot breathe, should I even be posting this? Will anyone read this? Will I delete this before I hit publish? 

EXHAUSTING.

Sometimes, everything is too much and there are times you need to just cut everything off an focus on yourself.
I will not write a giant novel today, instead, I will share a new app I am trying out.
I have been told meditation is amazing, how Buddhist spend hours a day meditating and how much it can benefit everyone for so many different reasons. I have a hard time with it but I have given it a try on and off over the years. 
I really like listening to Jason Stephenson on Youtube. His calm demeanour, voice and words help calm me down sometimes.  I recommend checking him out.

I also have found this app called Headspace. I am just using the free version, but I am enjoying the quick few minute meditations because let's face it, it's damn hard!

My Sweet old photo of my kitty who has kidney disease </3

That's all I will write for now.....

Anyone care to share anything?



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